Christopher Columbus's PowerPoint of Evil

Brian Vallie

After a very long trip, we've finally made it to your shores, we bring with us greed, corruption and disease by the spores.

We'll conceive Manifest Destiny for ourselves so strategically, it doesn't have a place for you though, and will end for you tragically.

You taught us to eat and survive when our lives were at stake, when we gain your trust we'll repay you with a smallpox outbreak.

When winter comes and your elders and children are cold, we'll give them nice fuzzy blankets to hold.

Gifts straight from the heart that are soft as a fox, did I mention they're knowingly infected with pox?

The smaller your numbers the more land we can claim, its nothing personal its just the name of the game.

Claiming good land and attempting to build wealth, is a right only for white settlers capable in health.

Your land is reserved and you cannot leave the space, we'll use force to make you stay so you all know your place.

As your wardens we'll make you dependent on what we give you, we will not let you hunt and our rations will feed few.

You see its a system of dependence that we want to create, through future generations to be all bound by fate.

A fate we've created to always keep you dependent, on the promises and lies of a deceitful government.

You'll go from a proud nation that in every way was thriving, to living in third world poverty and barely surviving.

We'll take away your beliefs and forbid your spirituality, our religious propaganda will take the form of Christianity.

To conquer you fully we must not only have your land, but you must take our beliefs and accept our God’s hand.

The Black Hills is one of your most spiritual places, so well taint it with our big ugly ass faces. When Mount Rushmore is built it will serve as a symbol that your hand of spirituality is now under our thimble.

This spiritual conquest is done when you all worship Christ, so we'll leave it up to your people to continue the heist.

We'll build churches on reservations complete with a bell, so tell all your non- believers they'll surely burn in hell.

Now lets have our great feast and kindly break bread, and since you don't speak English yet forget everything I said.

For our sinister plans don't benefit you at all, and I await the day when your Great Nations fall.


Christopher Columbus

Brian Vallie (Crow/Chippewa Cree), wishes to live in a world free of hipster headdresses and oppressive red tape towards Natives. He resides in Los Angeles, currently writing his first novel, Born Again Heathen, a dark comedy. When he's not writing you can find him playing "zombie" with his 5-year-old son James, zoning out, exercising, or traipsing around Los Angeles with his high school sweetheart, Janae.

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Waabooz Biboon's picture
Christopher Columbus would be shocked to know that the future of this country is coming to a pivotal point in a place called South Dakota (home of Pine Ridge, Rosebud and Yankton reservations.) There is a desperate fight going on politically in S. Dakota which will turn on the Native American Indian vote which will decide which party controls the American Senate and ultimately the future of America. Gradually, the Natives are taking the country back. Will this country slide back into a White and corporately controlled fascist oligarchy, or will Natives hit the voting booths and ignite the ninth fire? We are on the verge of a change in direction if enough Natives across this country get out and vote. It could be the start of a whole new era with Natives leading the way to a saner, more peaceful and wiser country and world.
Waabooz Biboon
Waabooz Biboon's picture
The Indian vote matters. In all but seven states, Indians constitute fewer than 5 percent of the eligible voters. In only two states—Alaska and New Mexico—do they account for more than 10 percent of the total population. But even in some cases where they count for no more than 1 or 2 percent of the population, Indian voters have been critical to the success of candidates for public office, and Democrats have usually been the beneficiaries. In North Dakota in 2012, thanks in part to the work of Seminole, challenger Heidi Heitkamp squeaked by to win a Senate seat in 2012. Indians, among whom she had campaigned heavily, provided her margin of victory. She now sits on the Committee on Indian Affairs. In 2008, in what turned out to be the longest vote count in Minnesota history, Al Franken won a Senate seat thanks in part to the efforts of Flanagan, who had previously volunteered for Paul Wellstone. As with Heitkamp, Indians gave Franken his margin of victory. He now sits on the Committee on Indian Affairs. Mobilization of the Indian vote was also crucial in the 2000 defeat for reelection of Republican Sen. Slade Gorton, the anti-Indian former attorney general of Washington state. Maria Cantwell won that contest by an extremely narrow margin. She is now chairwoman of the Committee on Indian Affairs. In 2002, the Indian vote gave the margin of victory to South Dakota Democrat Tim Johnson in a squeaker Senate race against John Thune. Johnson is a member of the Committee on Indian Affairs. Today, throughout the nation, some 85 Indians serve in elected office. There are two congressmen, numerous state senators and representatives, local sheriffs, county commissioners and city council members. Indians now have more authority to influence budgets and policies than at any time in U.S. history. *** To read full story, go here: http://www.dailykos.com/story/2014/10/09/1335418/-Here-s-how-we-re-going-to-help-win-South-Dakota#c95
Waabooz Biboon